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Thread: Do you talk to your tools

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    GTA Ontario Canada

    Do you talk to your tools

    Hi all

    No I have not been smoking any contraband ( I dont smoke) or drinking moonshine ( no still) but over the weekend I got to wondering how many other woodworkers talk to their tools like some gardners talk to their plants. I just finished re assembling my TS and talker to "her" all the way through. Dont know why its a her and it aint got no name but thats just the way it was.

    Do you do the same.?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Delton, Michigan
    i dont think i talk to them much they dont answer well but as for the puter i use each day yu bet and it aint always nice...
    If in Doubt, Build it Stout!
    One hand washes the other!
    Don't put off today till tomorrow!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    falcon heights, minnesota
    i seem to remember using a few choice phrases when my table saw tried to take off a part of my thumb a couple of years ago...

    i don't talk to my tools for 2 good reasons, one, they might answer
    and two, memories of 2 movies, one being full metal jacket, where gomer pyle is talking to his m14 while cleaning it, and the other being christine, when arnie says "show me", and the car rebuilds itself...

    not that i'm superstitious mind you, but when my dad asked me why i was throwing away a perfectly good, almost new table saw blade, i told him that its already gotten a taste of me, and i don't want it coming back for seconds...

    he seemed to understand...
    benedictione omnes bene

  4. #4

    I have always talked to my tools, but I was once told that people who often work alone do. With the exception of my old railroading days,I always have had jobs where I worked by myself and thus I talk to everything.

    Chainsaw, etc

    Growing up on a dairy farm, for many, many years it was just me "and the girls" since they were dairy cows and thus female cows. To this day everything I talk to is of the female gender. For instance if I take a bit too much of a bite off with a hand plane, I might say, "Easy there young lady." Or if something looks really good, I might say,"You are prettier then a speckled heifer." Other tools get the same kind of treatment.

    About the only thing I do wrong is, if things go really awry like tugging wood out with my tractor, I will call the tractor nasty names and yell at it, even though in the real world I was raised to never swear at a lady, nor yell at them. You see I am polite even if I am insane!
    I have no intention of traveling from birth to the grave in a manicured and well preserved body; but rather I will skid in sideways, totally beat up, completely worn out, utterly exhausted and jump off my tractor and loudly yell, "Wow, this is what it took to feed a nation!"

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Constantine, MI
    I do! I just wish some would come when called. Like the pencil I know I just laid down, or the square, or the rule......
    “We all die. The goal isn't to live forever; the goal is to create something that will.” - Chuck Palahniuk

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    I talk to myself sometimes, and the tools just look at me like I'm nuts....hate to think of how they'd react if I talked to them directly!
    Got Wood?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Tokyo Japan
    Talk to my tools.............? heck I name my tools
    The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.
    William Arthur Ward

  8. #8
    I talk to mine, all the time. If I typed it out, it would look like this on this forum: ***** **** ****! ****, ****. ****!!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Kea'au Hawaii. Just down the road from Hilo town!
    Quote Originally Posted by Travis Johnson View Post
    I might say,"You are prettier then a speckled heifer." Other tools get the same kind of treatment.
    Oh gosh that made me think of my Dad! One of his favorites was when we saw a good looking girl (and Mom wasn't around) "look at that little heifer!" and another one that just irked my wife was "pass the cow salve (butter)" at the dinner table After being married for over 50+ years Mom just ignored him

    I always talked to the cow when I milked them (hated milking cows) especially when I'd fall asleep on the stool with my head against their flank and they figured the machine had enough and stomped the cups off. That's been a couple of years ago!

    Listen to this old man ramble

    What goes around, comes around.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    St. Louis, MO
    Usually it's along the lines of " . . . you've got to be kidding me", "sweet!", or some moment of loud silence when i have a flood of explatives that i don't quite let fly.
    I haven't had any bites taken out of me yet, so it's been pretty tame.

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