Some Friday humor in preparation for "SUMMER"

A guy is 72 years old and loves to fish. He was sitting in his boat the

other day when he heard a voice say, 'Pick me up.'He looked around and

couldn't see any one He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say

again,'Pick me up.'


He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog.


The man said, 'Are you talking to me?'


The frog said, 'Yes, I'm talking to you. Pick me up then, kiss me and I'll

turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen.


I'll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous because I will

be your bride!'


The man looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up

carefully, and placed it in his front breast pocket.


Then the frog said, 'What, are you nuts? Didn't you hear what I said? I said

kiss me and I will be your beautiful bride.'


He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said,



'Nah, at my age I'd rather have a talking frog.'



With age comes wisdom.

Henry and Edna had been married for 50 years, and every year they went to the state fair.

They had a Helicopter at the fair, and Henry always said, Edna I want to ride on that helicopter.

Edna said Henry, it costs 50 bucks to ride on that thing, we can't afford it, 50 bucks is 50 bucks.

So while they argued back and forth, the helicopter pilot hears them, he says I'll tell you what, I'll take both of you up for free, if you can go the whole way without saying a word. but if you say one word, it's 50 bucks.

They agree, and off they go, the pilot takes off with a loop the loop, does all kinds of aerobatic moves, and not a word out of them.

He lands the helicopter, and turns to Henry and says I'm impressed, I didn't think you could do it!

Henry said, well I almost said something when Edna fell out, but 50 bucks is 50 bucks!

Rob, Dan, Those are good ones indeed! I could post some from here but most problably the spark would get lost in the translation!

Some Monday Humor to Get the Week Started

Saturday morning I got up early, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the dog and fishing equipment, slipped quietly into the garage to hook the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.

The wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day.

I went back into the house and slipped back into bed, where my wife was turned away from me. I whispered to her, "The weather out there is terrible."

My loving wife of 20 years replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that mess?"

I still don't know to this day if she was joking, but I've stopped fishing.