Results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: A christmas letter from 1990

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    Butte Montana which is 1/2 way between Purgatory and Heaven
    Posts
    170

    A christmas letter from 1990

    We live at 6000 feet elevation. Last night we dropped to 30 degrees and the snow level was 6200 feet. Coincidentally we were going through some papers and files to discard, and ran across this Christmas letter we sent out in 1990. I wrote this and someone sent it to some publication and it was printed, apparently it's been used by others. This is a condense version. I thought maybe those who live in the "winter" states or Canada would relate to this.


    MERRY CHRISTMAS

    The Elphisons wish all a Merry Christmas for 1990 . . . . and hope all are in good health and even though we are hardly heard from we want everyone to know we do think of you often and you're always in our prayers.

    We're still in Montana, our contracts have another year and we’re looking at some properties in Idaho, Utah and Montana. We have to have some place that has snow. If any of these materialize we will let you know. We just can’t visualize living anywhere but in snow country.

    Winter has arrived in Montana, it started on December 8th at about 5:00 pm. The first snow of the season, Carmella and I sat by the window with a hot buttered rum watching the soft flakes drift down clinging to the trees and covering the ground. It was really beautiful! Carmella started to cry and said that this is the main reason she likes to live in Montana. She said she could hardly wait until tomorrow to go out and shovel the snow. She said she could not live where there was not snow at Christmas.

    On the 9th we awoke to a big beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight, we see it every year but for some reason this time it looked special.
    - . .
    We shoveled snow for the first time this year and loved it. We did both the driveway and the sidewalk. Later the city snowplow came along and covered up our driveway with compacted snow from the street. He smiled and waved, I waved back, he seemed like a real nice guy. We shoveled it again.

    On the 12th the sun came out and melted most of the snow. We were disappointed, but we knew we would get more before winter is over. We didn't have to wait long, on the 14th we got 8 inches and the temperature dropped to minus 5 degrees. We shoveled the driveway and sidewalk again and shortly after the snow plow came by and did his little trick again.

    We went out on the 15th and bought snow tires for the car so we could get out of the driveway and on the way to the car I slipped and fell. The tires cost $150.00 the chiropractor was $250, but nothing was broke and both the car and I can get out of the driveway on our own accord, and we feel safer when we're driving on the snow and ice covered streets.. The damn sky was starting to get dark again.

    On the 16th we went to the mall and slid into a guardrail and blew one of the new snow tires and did $500.00 damage to the car.

    On the 17th we woke to 14 inches of that damn white stuff and we had to shovel again. The damn snowplow came by twice.

    On the 22nd we were assured of a white Christmas because another 7 inches of that white crap fell and with the temperature hanging around 30 degrees below zero it isn't going to melt before August.

    I wish somebody could explain to me why when a person makes it a point to go to the bathroom immediately before they don on their Car Harts, jacket, scarf, earmuffs, gloves, etc. and the minute they pick up the shovel they get an uncontrollable urge to go to the bathroom again.

    On the 23rd we were not really in the Christmas spirit. Peace on earth to all men etc. etc. I made a vow that if I ever get my hands on that SOB that drives that snow plow I would use his face as a shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for us to finish shoveling, and then comes down the street 100 miles an hour and throws that white crap everywhere.

    The morning of the 24th the newspaper predicated 12 more inches of snow. My god does anyone know how many shovels of snow 12 inches is! Carmella started to cry and was screaming to hell with Christmas and Santa Claus, he doesn’t have to shovel the damn stuff. I was trying to calm Carmella down and the snowplow driver came by asking for donations for some charity. Our lawyers and the doctors say he should be okay by spring.

    Christmas day, 12 more inches of snow, the toilet froze and part of the roof is sagging. I canceled our contracts and we’re looking at some properties in Southern California, Arizona and Puerto Rico.

    Merry Christmas to all . . . .

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Reno NV
    Posts
    13,361
    Bwahahahaha!!! I love snow and rain. We haven't had any measureable precipitation in probably 6 months.

    That cracks me up!
    Programmer - An organism that turns coffee into software.
    If all your friends are exactly like you, What an un-interesting life it must be.
    "A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of" Ogden Nash


  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    somewhere east of Queen Creek, AZ - South East of Phoenix
    Posts
    8,529
    Jiggs,
    Thats great, I would like to copy it and send it to some of my friends who tell me they love the 4 seasons..
    "There’s a lot of work being done today that doesn’t have any soul in it. The technique may be the utmost perfection, yet it is lifeless. It doesn’t have a soul. I hope my furniture has a soul to it." - Sam Maloof
    The Pessimist complains about the wind; The Optimist expects it to change;The Realist adjusts the sails.~ William Arthur Ward

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    North of Reno, NV...middle of the desert
    Posts
    1,930
    Funny...

    When I lived my 13 years in LA, I started to have this urge to move to Chicago. Couldn't figure out why (I spent a lot of business travel there and loved it, but not enough to move to cold winters and humid summers). Then it dawned on me, that growing up in "Barstow" (no comments from the peanut gallery), I was actually missing the different seasons. Soon as I got a grip on myself, I moved to SF instead.

    I always had said, why live in snow when you can just visit it. But I'm actually liking certain parts of the winter here in Reno and waking up to a 6" blanket of snow every now and then. But sure wish we'd get some rain soon

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Sharon Korn View Post
    Funny...

    When I lived my 13 years in LA, I started to have this urge to move to Chicago. Couldn't figure out why (I spent a lot of business travel there and loved it, but not enough to move to cold winters and humid summers). Then it dawned on me, that growing up in "Barstow" (no comments from the peanut gallery), I was actually missing the different seasons. Soon as I got a grip on myself, I moved to SF instead.

    I always had said, why live in snow when you can just visit it. But I'm actually liking certain parts of the winter here in Reno and waking up to a 6" blanket of snow every now and then. But sure wish we'd get some rain soon
    I intended to comment on this but if I do you will call me peanut

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    North of Reno, NV...middle of the desert
    Posts
    1,930
    Quote Originally Posted by ray hampton View Post
    I intended to comment on this but if I do you will call me peanut
    Feel free to bring it on. It's the butt of many Jay Leno Jokes, why not here

    However it was a great place to grow up in the 50-60's. Would not live there now. LA and Orange county organized bus loads of druggies and criminals and gave them a free one way ride up there.

    I worked for 2+ years at Fort Irwin (as a civilian). Had the most fantastic time driving tanks, riding in helicopters and taking the jeeps out on the old CA roads that no one got to go on since probably the 20's. For all you Canadian friends, the Canadian Airborne Regiment trained there one summer and I got to see all of their personnel and equipment arrive by parachute (that was the only way they were allowed to travel). I even still have a couple of their berets (probably illegal so don't tell on me)

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Amherst, New Hampshire
    Posts
    10,604
    Jiggs, thats how I start feeling abound the middle of December
    Faith, Hope & Charity

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    GTA Ontario Canada
    Posts
    12,260
    Great letter Jiggs. It pretty much follows the routine. Although our snow has been getting less and less each year. We have a corner and a snow plough driver that seems to mimic the guy you mention.
    cheers

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Tellico Plains, Tennessee
    Posts
    4,353
    Quote Originally Posted by Sharon Korn View Post
    Funny...

    When I lived my 13 years in LA, I started to have this urge to move to Chicago. Couldn't figure out why (I spent a lot of business travel there and loved it, but not enough to move to cold winters and humid summers). Then it dawned on me, that growing up in "Barstow" (no comments from the peanut gallery), I was actually missing the different seasons. Soon as I got a grip on myself, I moved to SF instead.

    I always had said, why live in snow when you can just visit it. But I'm actually liking certain parts of the winter here in Reno and waking up to a 6" blanket of snow every now and then. But sure wish we'd get some rain soon
    As Mark Twain once remarked.... "coldest winter I ever spent was Summer in San Francisco".... I loved the city, but always made sure I had a jacket in the car. I remember standing in the street outside of where I worked one July evening talking to one of the girls in the office.. I was wearing a suit jacket, but by the time I could get away from her, I was shivering so badly I had to turn on the heater in the car....the year before, in the summer when I still worked at the airport and was single, I drove a corvette convertible... I would drop the top, put the touneau (sp!) cover over the passenger side, turn the heater up 100% for the drive home after work... I usually got off about 11:30 or midnight.

    My step son was station at Barstow from about 1988 or 89 until he got out of the army in 1994... he was part of the group that trained the soldiers for "Operation Desert Storm"... he loved it there. Also had a nephew in the motor pool there in '92... I drove my mother from Dallas to the bay area for my daughter's wedding in Oct of '92 and we spent a night on base with my nephew... he was married and lived in base housing... pretty nice place as I remember.
    Chuck
    Tellico Plains, TN
    https://www.etsy.com/shop/TellicoTurnings
    My parents taught me to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder to find any.
    If you go looking for trouble, it will usually find you.

Similar Threads

  1. Letter from camp
    By Rich Soby in forum Off Topic Discussion
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 08-01-2011, 05:39 PM
  2. A letter to home
    By Jiggs Elphison in forum Off Topic Discussion
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 08-27-2010, 11:46 PM
  3. Need a Complaint Letter?
    By Vaughn McMillan in forum Off Topic Discussion
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 12-15-2009, 12:58 PM
  4. Letter Openers
    By Mark Pruitt in forum Lathe Project Showcase
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 08-14-2008, 05:57 PM
  5. Scrabble Letter Holders
    By Vaughn McMillan in forum Off Topic Discussion
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 11-16-2006, 04:17 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •