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Thread: Grummmmble Mummmble Traffic School

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    ABQ NM
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    30,020

    Grummmmble Mummmble Traffic School

    OK. Just to clear the air, I'm a criminal. I have been lawfully apprehended while performing an illegal U-turn, at a spot where it was clearly posted as being illegal. (I should note, however, with the exception of the lady motorcycle cop hiding in a parking lot behind some bushes, there were no vehicles within a quarter mile of visibility each way.) Anyway, I'm a scofflaw, and I'll probably break the law again one of these days. But I'm willing (sort of) to pay the price if I do get caught performing such illegal acts.

    Which brings me to the point of this thread (what little there is). In order to keep this heinous crime off my driving record (and the associated insurance costs), the State of California requires me to attend an 8-hour traffic school course. But thanks to modern technology, I can attend one of these "schools" from the comfort of my own home, via the Intarwebs.

    So today I finally signed up for an online traffic school...figured I should go ahead and get it over with, since the deadline is tomorrow. It's essentially a series of web pages that you read one at a time, each followed by short quiz to check that you read the material. It takes from 3 to 5 minutes to read each page. There is a timer at the bottom of each page, and you can't click to the next page until the timer runs out. I guess this is how they ensure you "attend" the course for the required length of time. When I started the course, I noticed that timer varied between 3 and 5 minutes per page. No problem...I figured this will move right along. Partway through the course though, I noticed the timer intervals were getting bigger, even though the page length has remained about the same. I'm now in section Five of the course (the last one), and the intervals are running 25 minutes per page. Still takes 3 to 5 minutes to read the page, but then I get to wait (surf the Internet or post mundane things on woodworking forums) for 20 minutes or so before I can go to the next page. Normally this wouldn't be a problem, but tonight, I've got other things I needed to do, and I have an early morning job to do tomorrow so I can't stay up as late as I usually do.

    Of course none of this would be a problem if I'd done the whole Traffic School thing a couple months ago when I got the ticket, but where's the fun in that?

    Oh well, my timer's at 5 minutes...time to go read another page.
    When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. - Hunter S. Thompson
    When the weird get going, they start their own forum. - Vaughn McMillan

    workingwoods.com

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Tokyo Japan
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    15,807
    Well at least they are in English

    A few years back, I too was clocked as one of the worst offenders in the country, I ride a 50cc scooter, and at all major intersections you are not allowed to turn against the traffic, you have to go through the intersection and stop, then wait for the light to change and then go straight. They call this a "Two Step Turn". The powers that be decide that some major intersections are not safe for this two step turn, and you can use the turn lane and to a regular turn, and in fact it is against the law to do a two step turn. These intersections are marked with a piddly little sign as you approach the intersection. I did not see one of these signs as a HUGE truck was illegally parked in front of the sign, I did the TST and got pulled over by a cop. We argued for over an hour and they basically would NOT let me go until I signed the ticket, I told them that I'd not sign it as I could NOT read it, they told me I had to, or I would be arrested. I told them to go ahead and arrest me. I had called my wife and she came to the cop shop but they would not let her in to see me and translate, finally a few hours later I gave in and signed the ticket. Then I went to fight the ticket, I had pictures taken on my cell phone (not great but they were pics) showing the truck illegally parked, etc, but in the end they would not accept my argument, because, I had signed the ticket, and on the ticket where I sign it, it said in Japanese that "By signing this ticket you are admitting to having broken the traffic law, if you would like to contest this ticket do not sign it" Yeah no kidding.

    Live and learn

    I had to go down to the traffic safety re-education office and sit through a lecture that would put a zen monk to sleep, I sat at the back of the class, and I brought a book to read, I read the book and then at the first hour break, most everyone went out for a coffee or smoke, only about half of them came back, the third hour break, again only half came back, at the end of the 4th hour out of the 100 or so people that started the program, only 20 or so remained, you see they only took attendance at the beginning of the first hour I knew I could not duck out as I was the only Gaijin in the room.

    There you go Vaughn, a few more minutes wasted, what is the timer at now?
    The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.
    William Arthur Ward

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Salt Spring Island, BC Canada
    Posts
    2,070
    Oh You bad, bad men.
    Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES..... NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS...............

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    ABQ NM
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    Well, I passed the exam. I am now an excellent driver.

    When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. - Hunter S. Thompson
    When the weird get going, they start their own forum. - Vaughn McMillan

    workingwoods.com

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Amherst, New Hampshire
    Posts
    10,604
    I'd respond to this thread but i don't associate with criminals.
    Faith, Hope & Charity

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    London, Ontario
    Posts
    3,383
    The comment on timing is interesting, as just yesterday at work (University) one of the guys was talking about how they were now making exams shorter because the students cannot read as quickly as they did 40 years ago. I'd never heard that statistic, but now your post tells a similar story
    There's usually more than one way to do it...
    www.wordsnwood.com ........ facebook.com/wordsnwood

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Buse Township MN
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    565
    Shoulda worn the spannies....and flashed that rock star smile
    Every child deserves a family. Adopt. Foster. Get involved.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Delton, Michigan
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    17,475
    well vaughn in D.C they allow u-turns right at the intersections couldnt belive it when i saw the first one.. i waited for the cops to come and got honked at for holding up traffic
    If in Doubt, Build it Stout!
    One hand washes the other!
    Don't put off today till tomorrow!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Outside the beltway
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    5,261
    Congratulations Vaughn.

    Larry we do have some places that have NO U Turn signs. Down town is loaded with them.
    I dream a lot. I do more painting when I'm not painting. It's in the subconscious.
    ::: Andrew Wyeth :::
    colonialrestorationstudio.com

  10. #10
    On Line Driving School???? Wish, back when I was a wreckless schoundrel trying to rule the roads, all they had was a 3 hour night school, with the drunks, potheads, and evildoers. What a waste, 1st hour, speech on "you are Evil"; then 2nd hour, movies on "Teeth, Hair, & Eyeballs allover the road"; 3rd hour, "How to keep from getting caught".

    During the breaks, most went to their cares for a nip or get stoned, I sucked down a half pack of Cigs. (I was smoking back then, that is how long it has been)

    I learned my lesson I payed attention the third hour and avoided capture or seem to have mastered the gift of gab and talked my way out of several... (I'm due for a lesson to be learned.)

    My latest evil doing was a "Rolling Stop" a cop car across the intersection from me I says "Do I Look Stupid" He says, "here's your Ticket"...

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