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Teaching Skinny Dippers a Lesson

scott spencer

scott spencer

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Location
Rochester, NY
I "borrowed" this from another forum...compliments of Ted Kitch...:thumb:

An elderly man in Texas had owned a large farm for several years. He had a beautiful large pond at the back of the property next to the road, and he'd fixed it up real nice with picnic tables, horseshoe pits, and he'd planted some nice flowers and fruit trees next to the pond.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond to look it over, as he hadn't been down there for a while. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.

As he neared the pond, he heard splashing and female voices shouting and laughing with glee.. As he came closer he saw that 5 young women had parked their car at the side of the road, climbed the fence and were skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went hurriedly splashing to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, "We're naked and we're not coming out until you leave!" The old man frowned and yelled back, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond."

Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm just here to feed the alligator."
 
Scott that is pretty funny, but don't be surprised if you are asked to change the wording a bit. Members on here are kind of thinned skinned when it comes to being offended. I would change everything to just "swimmers" and you should be okay.
 
Travis Johnson said:
Scott that is pretty funny, but don't be surprised if you are asked to change the wording a bit. Members on here are kind of thinned skinned when it comes to being offended. I would change everything to just "swimmers" and you should be okay.
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No Travis, we just enforce the rules when people won't abide by them.

Instead of snide remarks why don't you work to improve the forum? It is member run. You can move to change it. You could run for a moderator position.
 
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Nope, no snide remarks from me, just saying how it is. Granted I could have sent him a PM instead of posting this in a reply, but sooner or later someone would have jumped on and said "I am offended by that because...." I just came right out and made a suggestion pretty quick like. No, no snide comment at all, you just took it as such.

As for improving the forum, I think I do that. When the forum gets a little stagnant, which is not meant to sound bad, its just all forums have ebb and flows where posts stay unreplied to for periods of time, I try to jump in with something a little different that gets people thinking.

My recent lineshaft question today was meant to do that. To get people thinking about things in a different way. I think this is a role moderators should play, so while I am not technically one, I do try to reply to posts (especially posts with no replies) and to stimulate thought and avoid stagnation. I have read many times posts that say "I typically like your posts..." which to me is a huge compliment. That means people see I made a post and click on it because they feel it has merit and interest. I feel that is contributing to the forum in a very positive way.

You are absolutely right that I refuse to be a moderator. I did so on Wood Online, right along side of Ralph Jones (a new member on here) and will never do that again. One of the reasons is because I dislike whiners. I have very thick skin which is one of the reasons my posts (like the Amish coming to my town) can start out on a bad note and turn to good. I just don't get offended.

The COC rules of this website is great, and for the most part keeps things very civil which again is great. Still I think the past history and overall way this forum is run, tends to allow people to be overly offended. I tried so hard for the first 2 years on this forum to be civil, and yet it clearly became evident that no matter how hard I tried, someone would get offended at the most trivial of things. Now I pretty much have given up. For the mods that have to deal with this trivial stuff, I truly feel for them, but after 2 years of being a Mod on Wood Online, I am going to do everything I can to avoid overly-offended people. I just don't have it in me to deal with whiners.

As my Grandfather used to say: Life ain't fair so suck it up.

As for this post, or any of my posts, Vaughn can tell you that I have given him and any other Mod permission to edit and delete my posts as they deem fit. You don't even have to ask me. I am truly okay with it. I do think out of fairness to Scott, this reply and Jeff's reply should be moved to the Member's Only Forum.:dunno:

But contribute positively to this forum...yeah I think I do that. I am certainly not perfect, but we all contribute in positive ways...even if we are not Mods.
 
Scott, I've heard that joke before and find it funny :rofl::rofl:

Them older gents have learned a thing or two in their long lives, something that the younger folks should think about, before they claim to know everything :D :wave:

Do they have alligators in Texas :huh: :dunno: :rofl::rofl:
 
Stuart Ablett said:
Them older gents have learned a thing or two in their long lives, something that the younger folks should think about, before they claim to know everything
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Reminds me of a joke as long as we are telling them......


Two bulls are up on a hill overlooking a herd of cows, when the young bull says to the old one "Hey why don't we run down there and get cozy with a cow?"

Old bull looks at the young bull and says "Why don't we walk on down there and get cozy with them all?"
 
Greg Cook said:
Steve...

You have a PM... :D

:rofl:
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Okay....I got edjacated in Math today.:rofl:

On another note....I must be the only one who never ever went skinny dipping in my family. It was the subject of conversation one time and I was surprised everyone else had gone at least once.

I musta missed out a lot in life.....:rofl:
 
When young, we went skinny dipping because I (we) thought that was the way folks went swimming. Later, in junior high and high school years, a couple of us went skinny dipping in the water holes of local golf courses at night. We recovered lost golf balls then sold them to the pro shop the next day.
 
Steve Ash said:
Okay....I got edjacated in Math today.:rofl:
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Me too!

On another note....I must be the only one who never ever went skinny dipping in my family. It was the subject of conversation one time and I was surprised everyone else had gone at least once.

I musta missed out a lot in life.....:rofl:
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Me neither! Maybe we're doing something wrong Steve!
 
Oh come on guys, you are splitting hairs.:rolleyes:

In case anyone wants to know, what Greg is referring to is a statement I made quite awhile ago. As a lot of people know, my family has been in Thorndike, many, many years. As I often say, we have been farming this farm since before this state was even a state, or a country for that matter.

In 1757 one of my relatives, a Great Grandfather umpteen times removed, fought for the French and Indian War. Because he rose up through the ranks, word got back to the King of England that he was a good soldier. For his heroics, he was granted a parcel of land in what was then, The Mass Bay Colony in what is present day Maine. With endless tracks of land,such gifts were common back then.

A few years later, my family changed sides, fighting for the American's in the Revolutionary War. Because this family member rose quite high in the ranks as well, they were allowed to keep the land granted to my family after the United States became the United States. To this day we hold onto a portion of that land, and yes still farm it 251 years later.

What Greg is referring to is a statement I made where I said "My Great-Grandfather in 1757", which is technically incorrect. What I should have said was My Great Grandfather ten times removed..." As I said, that is kind of splitting hairs because I think a lot of people on here in the interest of typing fast, and keeping replies short, fail to spell out exactly what they mean.

In every way I really am proud of my family history. Not only has my family managed to hold onto a farm for an incredible 251 year history, they toed the line when some very important battles were being fought. To put it bluntly, the Veteran's of the American Revolution were really the bravest of the brave. They put their lives on the line for a Deceleration of Independence that was not proven yet. It was just some ideas about what government should be at that point. They were not just fighting for democracy as it existed, they were literally putting their lives on the line for the IDEA of democracy.

That is truly brave in my book. 2/3 of the nation back then were Tories, or aligned with the England. In this day an age we cannot even get people to vote, yet these guys decided a set of ideals were worth dying for, even if 66% of the nation did not agree with it. They saw a glorious form of government that many peasants of 3rd world nations wish for even today...200+ years later.

Thank goodness they did too because a democracy is what even this forum is based on.

You guys can pick on my math skills if you want. We all know it was a minor mistake in the big scheme of things. I got thick skin so I can take it, just as my family took the ungodly cold at Valley Forge, and watched as lead musket balls and chain shot fired from cannons, beat around them at the battle of Long Island. But if your family history does not date back as far as mine, just keep in mind that some brave Revolutionary War Solders paved the way for a safe country for yours to enter into. Now I won't bash any family for coming along after the American Revolution, I just think if you look at my family history as I do, I think you would be very proud of them too.
 
Travis Johnson said:
, they toed the line when some very important battles were being fought. To put it bluntly, the Veteran's of the American Revolution were really the bravest of the brave.



just as my family took the ungodly cold at Valley Forge, and watched as lead musket balls and chain shot fired from cannons, beat around them at the battle of Long Island. But if your family history does not date back as far as mine, just keep in mind that some brave Revolutionary War Solders paved the way for a safe country for yours to enter into. Now I won't bash any family for coming along after the American Revolution, I just think if you look at my family history as I do, I think you would be very proud of them too.
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I generally am a easy going guy.....once in a while I get my hackles up.

But I'll tell you one thing Travis, you do not have the edge on loyalty and patriotism in your family over others. I'm sure there are many here who can tell tales of bravery in the midst of battle. I have a long line of family members who served this country and lost their life in the face of battle, death marches and concentration camps. Had their heads beat in with the butt end of a enemy rifle, tortured and starved.

Sorry my family had not immigrated here before the revolution, (1837 for the Ash family) but it does not diminish my family, nor favor yours any more for doing a service to our country.
 
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