RANT: Tech support request....

Matt Warfield

Member
Messages
167
Location
Cedar Rapids, IA
Most of you probably don't know that I manage a tech support department for a rugged computer manufacturer. Occasionally, I need to request support from our vendors which usually goes well but I had to share this one. The vendor shall remain nameless. :)

Problem: Video card produces no output from the moment the system is powered on until....infinity.

Requested troubleshooting steps from vendor (abridged): Click on Start | All Programs | Accessories | System Tools | System
Information. When the System Information window is open, click on File | Export. Once the report is created, please include it with your ticket submission

Befuddled response:
Dear Techie (I was addressed as 'Customer'),

At this time, I cannot complete the requested steps as I’m still waiting for my neural link to arrive in order to identify (see) what the computer is intending to display. Once I have the neural link, I should be able to interact with the system and report back to you. At the moment, the faulty video card is preventing the system from communicating in its desired graphical manner. I’ve also tried removing the card and asking it directly why it doesn’t want to allow the system to communicate as desired without success. I’m at my wit’s end at this point and with the tracking number received from TransGalactic Logistic Transport showing the arrival of my neural connector being light years away, I thought it be best to contact you.

No, this is not a joke, but your suggested troubleshooting steps requested when compared with the failure mode certainly are. Please re-read and re-advise.

Kind regards,

Matt
 
One of the main problems nowadays is the people either do not read, or they do not understand what they are reading.

Some days ago newspaper here published a report that while most adolescents know how to read and write their understanding of what they read is very low, almost nil. Something must be wrong in the education system here.:dunno:

Too much TV and video games I think though...
 
same braod idea but not as techi as yours ,,my company i work for decided to spend 45 to 60 k for new system with a new impostion software,, well its not going well very complicated and redunat becasue they copied the idea from another major software company and had to change them to get theres to work.. what i could do with the old software now takes 3 to 4 times as long and the old software could have been updated for a 1000 dollars..:dunno::dunno::dunno: just to say they got anew and updated method of doing things.....have fun matt and oh yeah they cant talk to the new machine the simm cards are bad and they wont talk witht he main machine.. so a lackof puter talk is in the air i think:eek::eek:
 
same braod idea but not as techi as yours ,,my company i work for decided to spend 45 to 60 k for new system with a new impostion software,, well its not going well very complicated and redunat becasue they copied the idea from another major software company and had to change them to get theres to work.. what i could do with the old software now takes 3 to 4 times as long and the old software could have been updated for a 1000 dollars..:dunno::dunno::dunno: just to say they got anew and updated method of doing things.....have fun matt and oh yeah they cant talk to the new machine the simm cards are bad and they wont talk witht he main machine.. so a lackof puter talk is in the air i think:eek::eek:

Good luck with that one Larry. Someone sure didn't do their homework first.
 
Great response, Matt. I'd say it's about 50-50 as to whether they folks at the other end will realize what you're saying.

As someone who has run the Tech Support Department at a mid-sized software company (20 million or so licenses sold), I also don't have much patience for TS/CS folks who don't actually listen to (or read) the problem, but instead robotically pull canned "solutions" out of the database. :rolleyes:
 
It is always amusing how the quality gap between the companies that provide good tech support and everyone else is so unimaginably wide.
 
The problem does indeed lay with the education system. We hired an engineer who was reputed to be near the top of her class. She was a very nice girl. I could never figure out how she scored so high because she couldn't remember simple trouble shooting steps on common electrical problems. It got to the point that I wouldn't trust her to wire up a light switch. The company eventually moved her to a assembly line supervisor position because she did get along with people well. Of the 3 engineers we hired in our group, a weld robotic manufacturing plant, I would have fired 2 of them after 1 month. The one who worked out well was from a farming community and did a fine job.

My daughter is in her senior year at college and she is constantly telling me stories about how her fellow students struggle to do some of the rather simple tasks.
 
When I got my current laptop and turned it on the first time the first thing that I noticed was that the mouse pad didn't work. I checked all the obvious thing then I called tech support. I got ahold of someone in India I believe and she proceeded to tell me to click on the start button. HELLO, how can I select or click on the start button if I can't use the mouse. She kept on insisting that if I would click on the start Icon she would be able to help me get my mouse pad working, I finaly hung up, got a USB mouse and was able to get the thing working on my own.
 
When I got my current laptop and turned it on the first time the first thing that I noticed was that the mouse pad didn't work. I checked all the obvious thing then I called tech support. I got ahold of someone in India I believe and she proceeded to tell me to click on the start button. HELLO, how can I select or click on the start button if I can't use the mouse. She kept on insisting that if I would click on the start Icon she would be able to help me get my mouse pad working, I finaly hung up, got a USB mouse and was able to get the thing working on my own.

This is precisely the scenario which causes people to get hives at the thought of having to call tech support. By the way Don, Ctrl+Esc is the same as clicking the start button but she should have told you that. :D

I've got plenty of stories from the other side as well but I choose not to share those as I don't feel it's in the best interest of my customers. :)
 
It's always a trip to call the techies... I have a Dell computer that from the first day I got it has made noise in the CPU fan... sounds like a small Cessna revving up to take off.... I call the Dell tech line recently when it got to be really annoying.... I got "Michael" in Mumbai or Ahmadabad... First thing he wanted me to try was... "reformat your hard drive"... I told him it's a hardware problem, not software... then he came up with a sales pitch of Dell uses these heavy duty fans, etc etc.. blah blah... etc... :type:

I mentioned the problem a couple of months ago to a guy in the local hardware store who has a booth there to sell cell phones... he also used to sell internet service and computers, but has closed his shop... he said they were probably very old fans that has bearings that were dried out... he gave me a bottle of oil and told me how to oil the fan.. I opened the machine this week and put 1 drop of oil on the fan spindle... NO MORE CESSNA!:D
 
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