MY LATEST " GLOAT "

20 years ago, before I was declared legally blind, I quit hunting because I really lost interest in it, (plus since my wife and I always processed our own game and she informed me on day that if I were ever to bring home another animal I would hang along side of it)

Well any way my son in Denver has a hobby of smoking meats and making great sausages, salamis, beef sticks, etc. He called and said "Dad can you get me some deer meat?"

I told him I sold all my weapons of mass destruction except tor those found in my shop used primarily for butchering wood, but I would try and ask some friends.

I asked my eye doctor who hunts on his private acreage if he would shoot a deer for me. He said I would have to get a license and I could sit in his deer blind with one of his rifles and we'd get a deer.

So I bought a license, borrowed his rifle and went hunting. Just before dark he said he was going to go by the river bank about 300 yards from where we were at and see if there some deer in the willows, we hadn't seen any from the blind.

I waited about 20 minutes and climbed down and was getting things together and looked up and there was a deer not 30 yards from me standing broadside, not moving a muscle, looking in the opposite direction. I raised the weapon of mass destruction and aimed at the widest area, (actually I just pointed at it) pulled the trigger and KILLED the deer. My son has his deer
meat!

I went over and started dressing out the deer, and to be honest after 20 years I had a heck of time figuring out how to start. Anyway I had trouble splitting the pelvic, so I raised my knife like a hatchet, came down and hit my thumb between the two knuckles. I hit the bone (mine, not the deers) and severed the tendon.I had surgery Monday. We had to wait a week to get rid of the infection caused from completing dressing out the deer and assisting my Doctor friend dressing out his deer.

I brought home the deer and told my wife that I would take it to the butcher shop and pay 80 cents a pound an have it processed., and by the way they weigh the carcass and the hide to establish the weight. Well if you were to glaze into the eyes of that deer carcass and then into my wife's eyes the deer showed more love and compassion then she did.

I de-boned the deer and than went to the emergency hospital to be treated for the thumb. by now it looked like one of my son's sausages, before the casing. The next day my wife spoke not a word, just putting the steel to some knifes. She picks out all the sinew, fat and hair, washes the meat a dozen times and gets it ready to grind. When I asked if she needed some held she just said "go to your shop and leave me alone"

We had purchased an electric meat grinder for my son's xmas gift, we unwrapped it, ground the meat, cleaned it and wrapped it back up for xmas.

We did the whole thing in hamburger, and got 31 pounds, yes there was some meat left on the bones. I think I could of had our friend in Japan send me some Kobe beef and it would have been cheaper.

My wife is speaking to me again. It's kinda soft and growling, and it's the same thing over and over, Don't you ever do this again! She did ask if I was going to be able to finish some gifts for the kids at church and if she could help me in anyway. I think she still loves me, I know I love her, have for 49 years.

Jiggs Elphison
 

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Sorry about the hand Jiggs, but that was a great story. I really enjoyed reading it.
By the way I'm glad you shot the deer and not your eye doctor. You had me wondering there for a second.:rofl:
 
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