Senior Citizen Discount?

Bart Leetch

Member
Messages
3,206
Location
Clinton, Washington on Whidbey Island
Senior Citizen Discount? Who me? You bet!

Jack

$5.37! That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me.
I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something that used to be a Jolly Rancher. Having already handed the kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the truck to grab some change when the kid with the Elmo hairdo said the hardest thing anyone has ever said to me. He said, "It's OK. I'll just give you the senior citizen discount."

I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of change hitting the counter in front of me. "Only $4.68" he said cheerfully.

I stood there stupefied. I am 56 , not even 60 yet? A mere child! Senior citizen?

I took my burrito and walked out to the truck wondering what was wrong with Elmo. Was he blind? As I sat in the truck, my blood began to boil. Old? Me?

I'll show him, I thought. I opened the door and headed back inside. I strode to the counter, and there he was waiting with a smile.

Before I could say a word, he held up something and jingled it in front of me, like I could be that easily distracted! What am I now? A toddler?

"Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?" I stared with utter disdain at the keys. I began to rationalize in my mind.

"Leaving keys behind hardly makes a man elderly! It could happen to anyone!"

I turned and headed back to the truck. I slipped the key into the ignition, but it wouldn't turn. What now? I checked my keys and tried another. Still nothing.

That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging from my rear view mirror.
I had no purple beads hanging from my rear view mirror.

Then, a few other objects came into focus. The car seat in the back seat. Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard. A partially eaten doughnut on the dashboard.

Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien vehicle.

Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot, relieved to finally be leaving this nightmarish stop in my life. That is when I felt it, deep in the bowels of my stomach: hunger! My stomach growled and churned, and I reached to grab my burrito, only it was nowhere to be found.

I swung the truck around, gathered my courage, and strode back into the restaurant one final time. There Elmo stood, draped in youth and black nail polish. All I could think was, "What is the world coming to?"

All I could say was, "Did I leave my food and drink in here"? At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to help me back to my vehicle, and then go straight home and apply for Social Security benefits.

Elmo had no clue. I walked back out to the truck, and suddenly a young lad came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention. He was holding up a drink and a bag. His mother explained, "I think you left this in my truck by mistake."

I took the food and drink from the little boy and sheepishly apologized.

She offered these kind words: "It's OK. My grandfather does stuff like this all the time."

All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40. Yes, I was racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius. And no, I told the officer, I'm not too old to be driving this fast.

As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the hall. I handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket. I promptly sat in my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blanket.

The good news was I had successfully found my way home.

Pass this on to the other old fogies on your list.

Notice the larger type? That's for those of us who have trouble reading.

P.S. Save the earth...... It's the only planet with chocolate !!!!!
 
Up in Silly-cone Valley my nickname was Gramps. This came about while I was fooling around with my buddies kids while he shopped for a new rollaway tool chest. Their mom couldn't see us behind the aisle and asked where the kids were. The helpful clerk responded "Its OK. They're with Gramps. The name has stuck since the dot.coms bombed and we've all moved to the four corners. . . . sheesh.
 
We have lived in this retirement community since I was in my mid-30s. I used to resent the old people getting discounts just because they happened to live to a certain age. But, I see it differently now that I get the benefit. :rolleyes:
But, it is not just charity, it is good marketing and helps everyone.
 
Already there... Soon you'll be able to hide your own Easter Eggs... :thumb:

Senior moments allow you to never have to watch Re-Runs on TV... :rofl:

Reading your Plight just reminds me of a daily ritual some of us endure. Wait till you see gray hairs opening the door for you... :eek:
 
I was in Niagara Falls last year, and I went into one of the cheesy museums, the touristy places, and the little adorable girl taking money gave me the price for admission and said, ok, with your discount, and I said discount, she said, yeah, senior citizen discount, and at first she hurt my feelings. she must have been all of 18 or 19. I said, wow, do I look that old, and she was very clever and smart, she said, no, not at all, you look like my dad, I mean you look the same age and hes 55. I let her slide, since she said I look like her dad.Ill always take a discount, hope woodcraft gives discounts for over 55, Ill send them a copy of my birth certificate.Bron
when I was around 50, maybe younger, my son took me in Harrisburg Pa to my first IMax theater, I think we saw superman, the girl there asked me if I was a senior discount.......really stinks.......young people think anyone over 40 is a senior.
 
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I'm (ugh) 56, but they still ask for my ID. Brent just says it's because the law requires them to. But I say, well the signs say only if you look under 35.

It's so good to be in denial (you know, that river that runs through downtown Cairo). :rofl::rofl::rofl:

the they still ask for my I D too and I amm close to three score and ten
 
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