Corporal Punishment

My teachers and principals carried a paddle or had instant access to it. I took beatings in grade school, behaved in middle school and got it again in high school. I don't think the whippings were as bad as I thought...

That was pretty much my experience, too. Every teacher seemed to have his/her preferred strap or paddle. One even used an English riding crop!
 
that surprizes me mohammad i didnt realize they were like that over there..
one thing i have heard way to often is you cant spank me or do that or i will call the cops or even the real smart ones know the right place ,,child services..that is the attitude that i feel needs to be stopped..our children need to understand discipline and respect both at the same time..i can remeber when the bus drivers had same control over the riders now the riders appear to rule the drivers..

That was because the schools began teaching it several years ago when child abuse was the crisis dujour in America then replaced by the anti smoking campaign...... now well... the damage is done..

My father used to say to my teachers " if he gets out of line... whack him one"
At home my father was a bit more heavy handed than a slap, he liked to use a closed fist, a boot or his favorite that 2inch wide leather belt that was more like a barber's strop and he would fold it in half and let us have it!
 
children need to be taught the difference between right and wrong at home.

a child that is brought up accepting a little violence as a way of life will use it for the rest of his or her life.
 
a child that is brought up accepting a little violence as a way of life will use it for the rest of his or her life.

Perhaps that's what you believe, but I can assure you that it isn't necessarily true. My mom and dad beat my butt regularly for the first 12 or so years of my life (and I mostly deserved it too :eek:). Sometime in my early teens, I remember being a smart aleck to my mother and my father informing me that I was too big to spank any longer. He said the next time I was disrepectful to mom, he was going to belt me with his fist. This may seem a bit harsh but the message was well received and I changed my ways. My father never hit (nor for that matter, ever even threatened to hit) me again. I've never struck another human being in violance since I was 12 years old.
 
Sorry for being long winded.

I just finished my 18th year of teaching. I've taught from 6th grade to 12th. Does that make me an expert about human behavior and how to discipline children? No, far from it.

I have however had kids in class that came from situations of abuse that would make your hair curl. A lot of them were the sweetest, kindest, caring kids I have ever known. I often wonder how they cope so well.

On the other hand I've had kids that come from families that I know personally that are caring, nurturing parents and I'd like to pinch the kids head off.

There's a difference between busting someone and beating someone. There's a difference between discipline and abuse.

I got busted once each year I was in high school. Did I deserve it, you betcha. Did it warp my psyche for life? No, I look back and appreciate the principle for doing it.

The one thing I try to instill into all my kids is that life is about choices. You either choose to do right or you choose to do wrong, and there are consequences with both.

I usually write this quote on my board from John Wooden and leave it up for awhile.

"You receive the treatment you earn and deserve."

Since I started teaching kids have changed folks. A lot of them aren't taught what respect is and how to show respect to other people.

I'll say this and then shut-up. We are raising and entitlement society. It's about me and not we.
 
peter, my view stems from Im a firm believer our parents are our best teachers.
May not be the right thing we learn from them, but we learn alot from them growing up.

who will be the judge when someone strikes my child as to whether or not too much physical force was used?
 
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Jeepers. I knew I lived a sheltered life. However, I had no idea how sheltered. My father gave me one swat on the behind one time in my entire life. My mother never laid a hand on me. I do not recall any teacher I had laying a hand on any student.

Kept after school---you bet. However, nothing physical. I wonder how my parents would have reacted if a teacher swacked me. Both of my parents were very strong on "right is right." They also realized that there could be consequences and that you had to live with those consequences. Regardless, you did what was right.

I think I turned out to be a very good person. On the other hand one of my classmates murdered a high-school senior working at a filing station. He got something like sixteen-dollars from the till. He was one of the two bullies in my class.

I am quite sure that the teachers did not even realize that those two were bullies. I don't know how those teachers could have grown up, yet have so little knowledge about children. The kindergarten teacher was probably OK. I just don't remember that much about her. All of the teachers in the other 5 grades (I skipped a year) did not understand kids. Their idea of teaching was yelling to try to make you remember the date General Mason farted at the battle of something or another.

As usual, I really got wound up. But everyone of those teachers should have been fired. My oldest son had excellent teachers in grade school. Glenn went to the same school two years behind and had acceptable teachers.

I was one of the five that started the International Reading Association (It had a less high-faluten name when we started). I worked with very many grade school teachers. The great majority were excellent---I suppose the less dedicated teachers just didn't go to educational seminars. The quality of the teachers, who were striving to find the best way to teach their students, was a wonderful thing to behold.

Enjoy,

Jim
 
Up until 7th grade, I went to small-town schools that allowed paddling, although I only remember two or three times when anyone actually got the swat (boys only, no girls)...the threat alone was enough to keep most of us reasonably in line. I do recall that if we were acting up first thing in the morning when the whole school was standing outside saying the Pledge of Allegiance, my 4th grade teacher would sneak up behind us and thump our ears with his fingertip. On a cold morning, it'd sting like a son of a gun. :eek: Never got the paddle, but my ears got thumped a time or two. From 8th grade on, I was in a larger school system that didn't allow corporal punishment.

At home, I was deservedly on the receiving end of a swat or a belt on the butt a fair number of times. It was never done rashly or abusively by my dad...more of a dutiful action with plenty of discussion about why I was getting what I was getting. It truly did hurt him more than it hurt me. By my teen years, spankings were out, although I did get a knee to the butt a time or two. My folks were always very fair and even-handed with discipline, but what they said was the law. Break the law, and pay the consequences. If Mom said "Cut that out or you'll sit in the car", we cut it out, because we knew she'd drag us out to the car without hesitation. So my sisters and I toed the line, especially in public. Strangers would approach my parents at restaurants to compliment them on how well-behaved their kids were. (We had 'em buffaloed.)

Allen, I completely respect your position. In today's world, I don't think I'd be comfortable with other people disciplining my kids. (Take that with a grain of salt, since I've never had kids.) I think some of that mindset comes from having lived in a medium to huge city for the past 40 years or so. I honestly don't know if I'd spank my kids. I do know I'd try to be as even-handed and unwavering in discipline as my own parents were, though.
 
I don't remember my parents ever hitting me. They both had a way of making me feel like I really disappointed them when ever I screwed up. That feeling was worse than any beating. I do remember my mother chasing me into my bedroom while wielding a coathanger. I was about 7 or 8 and I set the woods behind my house on fire while playing with matches. I don't think she ever hit me with it though.

Nothing wrong with spanking your kid in my opinion. Not beating, but a good swat on the butt gets their attention. My kids would get a light whack on the head with a wooden spoon by my wife at the dinner table if they refused to behave. You have to imagine the chaos at the dinner table in a small kitchen with 6 kids all feeling their oats at the same time.:eek: None of the kids ever went to bed though without a hug and an I love you.

I can't tolerate bullys. The few fights I have ever been in was while standing up for some kid being picked on. I was always a pretty big kid and kind of intimidating. Most often the bully would back down pretty quick when I confronted them. Most of them are cowards.
 
in response to vaughns story of the car stockade...i also had the stay in the car rule and you didnt get out,, they always new if we did..later on in life with my own daughters they to knew the rules and while in a restaurant or public place were behaved or they would be disciplined for it.. had to take one of them to grade school for a enrollment day had a appt along with many other families.. we came in the school was told to set down till we were called, we did,, but they was a tribe of unruly kids running around where ever they wanted and on several occasions they were brought back by school workers and told to stay here to there parents who were to busy talking to watch over there own kids .. after we left my daughter asked me why didnt those kids behave ? i told her they apparently dont have to at home either.. its a pleasant sight to see any child behave properly and have respect for the rules and others but it sure isnt pleasant to see it the other way.. i cant imagine tryun to teach kids today in school with what i see to much of in misbehaved kids..
 
I've noticed a common thread here and that's expectations are set and consequences are given if those expectations aren't met. That's a big part of the problem today. Children have no expectations for behavior. They aren't taught what's expected.

My daughter just turned 15 and I've probably spanked her 3 times in her life. Those times were when she was little and what ever she was doing would have resulted in death or dismemberment. She's always been a really good kid.

My son on the other hand, well lets just say for awhile the guy at the paint desk at the borg knew me well. The 5 gallon paint sticks make great reinforces.
When he was about 6 he had done something and I was talking to him. I told him I was of half a mind to spank him. He told me if I would spank him could he go do what he was wanting to do. I learned then that spanking wasn't a deterrent for him it was a means to an end.

This past school year he and a couple of his buddies were putting hand soap in the floor of the restroom and sticking their finger in the sink faucet and spraying water in the floor. They would then slide in the floor with their feet. I found out he was doing it and we stayed after school and he cleaned the entire bathroom. It took a good 45 min. I then made him apologize to the custodian, principle, and assistant principle.

Before this though he asked me if I would just spank him instead. I said I would have to spank him for a long time. He asked how long, and I said till the sun went down. It was around 4:30, so that would have been about 2 hours. He kind of paused and then said "that's a long time, but I'd rather you do that than ground me".

I share this because spanking is not the be all end all for discipline. You need to find what works and use that.
 
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From what I can recall{lol} up until high school, worse we had was 'stand in the corner' or a trip to the principal's office{which usually lead to detention}...HS was where I was introduced to the paddle on a few occasions :eek:... Home punishment was verbal from Mom, & brutal from Dad, didn't take more than two encounters with Dad's belt to know that listening to mom was the right thing to do...I know that if I back talked my parents like these kids I see now-a-days do, I would of had to wear a full set of dentures to the prom...can't understand how the parents let 'em get away with it :dunno:
 
I don't remember my parents ever hitting me. They both had a way of making me feel like I really disappointed them when ever I screwed up. That feeling was worse than any beating. I do remember my mother chasing me into my bedroom while wielding a coathanger. I was about 7 or 8 and I set the woods behind my house on fire while playing with matches. I don't think she ever hit me with it though.

Nothing wrong with spanking your kid in my opinion. Not beating, but a good swat on the butt gets their attention. My kids would get a light whack on the head with a wooden spoon by my wife at the dinner table if they refused to behave. You have to imagine the chaos at the dinner table in a small kitchen with 6 kids all feeling their oats at the same time.:eek: None of the kids ever went to bed though without a hug and an I love you.

I can't tolerate bullys. The few fights I have ever been in was while standing up for some kid being picked on. I was always a pretty big kid and kind of intimidating. Most often the bully would back down pretty quick when I confronted them. Most of them are cowards.

Ding, ding, ding :thumb::thumb::thumb:.....My wife works as a counselor at a grade school...if all her kids there got that at home, even once a week instead of everyday, she wouldn't be as busy IMO.
 
As do I. The decision to use violence against a child says far more about the person who considers violence an option than it does about the child or the child's behavior.

Thanks,

Bill

well bill, i can see that you may have ill feelings towards some of the responders here,, in my case just because i didnt write that i hugged and said i love you to my children every night doesnt mean that i was abusive and that they didnt feel loved or wernt respected..
some ones definition of violence isnt always as it is,, sometimes definitions are to broad.. and in todays society they tend to make things worse than they are in some cases..
 
Id have a hard time founding out some 52 y/o male principal made my 12 y/o daughter bend over so he could cane her rear end.
Id probably be dead if I lived in the country you lived in, because I would have paid the principal a visit with a baseball bat and caned his skull a few times.

I wasn't going to chime in at all because it is such a touchy subject and at the edge of going overboard on CoC.
I do have my own views. A bit on the old fashioned side.
But, I have to agree with Allen. The guys head is not all I would beat on with the bat.
Let's voluntarily close this thread.
 
I have to say that when any of my kids messed up at school I would stand behind the principal or teacher 100%.
But if anyone, teacher or other parent hit my kid, I would probably be arrested.
 
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