Doug McLauchlan
Member
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- 8
- Location
- Portland, OR
For my Dad they would send him to school in winter with a hot boiled potato in his pocket - keep's you warm AND feeds you for lunch !
How Poor Were You?
- Thread starter Vaughn McMillan
- Start date
- Messages
- 11,636
- Location
- Constantine, MI
Let's see. This morning I woke up in a bed, under a roof that own most of (the bank owns the rest) opened the fridge, had breakfast and packed myself a lunch. Walked across my lawn, got into a car that is paid for, drove 25 miles without having to show anyone a passport or "papers", unlocked the door to my office, sat down in front of a computer and got ready to communicate with the world.
I think that puts me in the top 3% richest in the world. Poor, by world standards - no way. We are so blessed it's easy to start complaining about what we don't have. There's been some hard times, yes. But overall, fortunate - most fortunate.
So, I can keep up with the topic, I've lived on pasta for weeks on end, and I did walk a mile to school in the snow (uphill both ways
), and my mom can tell stories of being thankful for ketchup spread on stale bread - but I know it's all in jest as, down deep, I count my blessings every day.
Karl Laustrup
Member
- Messages
- 487
- Location
- Wisconsin Dells, WI
we were so poor my parents couldn't afford any toys for us boys, so they'd tie a bone around our necks so the dog would play with us.
Does that work with LOYL too????
Karl
- Messages
- 36,123
- Location
- ABQ NM
Four well-dressed men are sitting together at a vacation resort.
Michael Palin: Ahh ... Very passable, this, very passable.
Graham Chapman: Nothing like a good glass of Chateau de Chassilier wine, ay Gessiah?
Terry Gilliam: You're right there Obediah.
Eric Idle: Who'd a thought thirty years ago we'd all be sittin' here drinking Chateau de Chassilier wine?
MP: Aye. In them days, we'd a' been glad to have the price of a cup o' tea.
GC: A cup ' COLD tea.
EI: Without milk or sugar.
TG: OR tea!
MP: In a filthy, cracked cup.
EI: We never used to have a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.
GC: The best WE could manage was to suck on a piece of damp cloth.
TG: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.
MP: Aye. BECAUSE we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, "Money doesn't buy you happiness."
EI: 'E was right. I was happier then and I had NOTHIN'. We used to live in this tiiiny old house, with greaaaaat big holes in the roof.
GC: House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
TG: You were lucky to have a ROOM! *We* used to have to live in a corridor!
MP: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of livin' in a corridor! Woulda' been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woken up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House!? Hmph.
EI: Well when I say "house" it was only a hole in the ground covered by a piece of tarpolin, but it was a house to US.
GC: We were evicted from *our* hole in the ground; we had to go and live in a lake!
TG: You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road.
MP: Cardboard box?
TG: Aye.
MP: You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six o'clock in the morning, clean the bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down mill for fourteen hours a day, week in, week out. When we got home, out Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt!
GC: Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at three o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of hot gravel, go to work at the mill every day for tuppence a month, come home, and Dad would beat us around the head and neck with a broken bottle, if we were LUCKY!
TG: Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock at night, and LICK the road clean with our tongues. We had half a handful of freezing cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and when we got home, our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.
EI: Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed, (pause for laughter), eat a lump of cold poison, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad would kill us, and dance about on our graves singing "Hallelujah."
MP: But you try and tell the young people today that ... and they won't believe ya'.
ALL: Nope, nope ...
(Four Yorkshiremen Sketch, Monty Python)
Michael Palin: Ahh ... Very passable, this, very passable.
Graham Chapman: Nothing like a good glass of Chateau de Chassilier wine, ay Gessiah?
Terry Gilliam: You're right there Obediah.
Eric Idle: Who'd a thought thirty years ago we'd all be sittin' here drinking Chateau de Chassilier wine?
MP: Aye. In them days, we'd a' been glad to have the price of a cup o' tea.
GC: A cup ' COLD tea.
EI: Without milk or sugar.
TG: OR tea!
MP: In a filthy, cracked cup.
EI: We never used to have a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.
GC: The best WE could manage was to suck on a piece of damp cloth.
TG: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.
MP: Aye. BECAUSE we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, "Money doesn't buy you happiness."
EI: 'E was right. I was happier then and I had NOTHIN'. We used to live in this tiiiny old house, with greaaaaat big holes in the roof.
GC: House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
TG: You were lucky to have a ROOM! *We* used to have to live in a corridor!
MP: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of livin' in a corridor! Woulda' been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woken up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House!? Hmph.
EI: Well when I say "house" it was only a hole in the ground covered by a piece of tarpolin, but it was a house to US.
GC: We were evicted from *our* hole in the ground; we had to go and live in a lake!
TG: You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road.
MP: Cardboard box?
TG: Aye.
MP: You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six o'clock in the morning, clean the bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down mill for fourteen hours a day, week in, week out. When we got home, out Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt!
GC: Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at three o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of hot gravel, go to work at the mill every day for tuppence a month, come home, and Dad would beat us around the head and neck with a broken bottle, if we were LUCKY!
TG: Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock at night, and LICK the road clean with our tongues. We had half a handful of freezing cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and when we got home, our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.
EI: Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed, (pause for laughter), eat a lump of cold poison, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad would kill us, and dance about on our graves singing "Hallelujah."
MP: But you try and tell the young people today that ... and they won't believe ya'.
ALL: Nope, nope ...
(Four Yorkshiremen Sketch, Monty Python)
Steve Russell
Member
- Messages
- 83
- Location
- The Woodlands, Texas
Ha! Try this on for size...
Hello Vaughn,
When I was a kid, we were so poor we took nothing sandwiches to school for lunch. A nothing sandwich is two pieces of white bread and "nothing" else. If we were flush, we might get some Mayo on one side, but that did not happen very often.
Hello Vaughn,
When I was a kid, we were so poor we took nothing sandwiches to school for lunch. A nothing sandwich is two pieces of white bread and "nothing" else. If we were flush, we might get some Mayo on one side, but that did not happen very often.
Bart Leetch
Member
- Messages
- 3,206
I'm was so poor I have started buying old tools & reconditioning them both power tools & now hand tools & am now just about out of room in this rented shop. & now I am so poor I have to some day buy some old land & recondition it & may even have to buy an old shop to recondition & put on it.
Actually we were so poor when I was a kid we had this pig named Elmer & one day when a neighbor came he asked what happened to Elmer because he had a peg leg & Dad said well you know Elmer has been with us for a long time & as you know he saved us by waking us up when the house caught on fire a few years back. Well you see we love Elmer & just couldn't eat him all at once.
& now I am so poor I have to some day buy some old land & recondition it & may even have to buy an old shop to recondition & put on it. Actually we were so poor when I was a kid we had this pig named Elmer & one day when a neighbor came he asked what happened to Elmer because he had a peg leg & Dad said well you know Elmer has been with us for a long time & as you know he saved us by waking us up when the house caught on fire a few years back. Well you see we love Elmer & just couldn't eat him all at once.
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- Messages
- 11,636
- Location
- Constantine, MI
You had bread?Hello Vaughn,
When I was a kid, we were so poor we took nothing sandwiches to school for lunch. A nothing sandwich is two pieces of white bread and "nothing" else. If we were flush, we might get some Mayo on one side, but that did not happen very often.
- Messages
- 36,123
- Location
- ABQ NM
That, my friend, made me laugh out loud.You had bread?
- Messages
- 11,636
- Location
- Constantine, MI
ahhhhhh. Having made someone laugh I can now go home in peace. My work here is done.That, my friend, made me laugh out loud.
Kirk Constable
Member
- Messages
- 414
- Location
- Seguin, TX
Rodney Dangerfield had a whole lots of 'We were so poor'... jokes. Many of which prolly wouldn't be appropriate here.
He was one of few comedians that could make me laugh out loud.
KC
He was one of few comedians that could make me laugh out loud.
KC
- Messages
- 11,636
- Location
- Constantine, MI
One of my all time favorites. I remember staying up late to watch him on Carson. When the two of them were on the same screen it meant that there was howling laughter in our house.Rodney Dangerfield had a whole lots of 'We were so poor'... jokes. Many of which prolly wouldn't be appropriate here.
He was one of few comedians that could make me laugh out loud.
KC
Travis Johnson
Member
- Messages
- 2,369
You guys had it easy, while you guys were pretending you had something to eat, my brother and I were walking to school, 12 miles on the way to school, and 15 miles on the way back, uphill both ways and with no shoes on our feet. Walking barefoot in the snow was not much fun here in Maine, so we used to wrap newspapers around our feet to keep them warm. In fact we used to fight over the comics because they kept your feet warmer...
I actually heard this all the time from my father growing up. He did have it pretty rough I must say. He had a two holed outhouse, but it was a double decker and not much fun if you got there second
I actually heard this all the time from my father growing up. He did have it pretty rough I must say. He had a two holed outhouse, but it was a double decker and not much fun if you got there second